physician heal thyself
Letter from Dad
My Son,
Theres a fire in you I admire your courage to speak truth in a system built to silence, your refusal to conform to the machinery that turns people into numbers, pain into profit. But I see the toll its taking on your spirit. You carry the resentment like a second skin. And I get it how could you not? This world, especially the world of medicine, often rewards obedience over authenticity, speed over presence, and profit over people.
But son, let me offer you something to sit with: you cannot truly heal others if you yourself are unhealed. You can bandage wounds, prescribe treatments, even extend comfort but the deep healing that changes lives, that kind only flows from a heart that is whole. And wholeness doesn't mean perfection. It means integration. Peace with your pain. A firm root in your values, not your rage.
Lets talk about that rage. Anger is not your enemy. Its a compass it points to injustice, betrayal, moral injury. But if left untended, it calcifies into resentment. And resentment poisons the healer. Let your anger inform you, not imprison you.
To begin healing, youll need to return to the 4 As:
Authenticity: Dont lose yourself trying to fix the system. Let your medicine flow from who you truly are, not who you think you must be.
Agency: You may not control the entire system, but you can choose how you show up in it, where you pour your energy, what you say yes or no to.
Anger: Let it burn clean. Don't stuff it down or lash it outexpress it wisely, and let it be a catalyst, not a cage.
Acceptance: Not of injustice, but of reality. This is the terrain. You can't plant a garden by denying the soil.
And then lean into the 5 Cs of compassionthe kind that doesnt dilute truth, but transforms pain:
Ordinary human compassion: You don’t need to be a savior. Just a human, doing his best, offering presence.
Curiosity compassion: Ask why the pain exists. Why you carry so much of it. Ask without judgment.
Recognition compassion: See yourself in your patients. And see them in you. Youre not separate.
Truth compassion: Speak the hard truths to others, yes, but also to yourself. Healing begins there.
Possibility compassion: Believe that a better world, and a freer version of yourself, is possible even if the path there is long and winding.
I want you to know I’m proud of the stand you take. But I also want you to come home to yourself. Not just in exhaustion, but in love. The world is heavy but your soul doesn’t have to be. Heal, not just so you can help others, but because you deserve it too.
Always in your corner,
Dad
